1. |
Heroscape
06:48
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In another life I'd consider you a good friend
Statistically, I've died in it by now
How come you've never even visited your hometown
Don't you wonder if your lack of love's innate
When is late too late
In your opinion to change
Are you as powerless as I was
I know you know who I am now
I know you feel ashamed
You taught me how to believe some are just born evil
It's a shame it had to end the way it did
It's a shame it had to end the way it did
I heard you moved to Brooklyn with your backpack
Just you and foggy streets and skateboard wheels
I heard you hurt somebody back in college pretty bad
I heard you slipped something into her drink
How far is too far
In your opinion to draw the line
I know you're not as Catholic as your mom
But she could trust you
And if I could trust you
I got kinda scared that I could end up like you
So I'm kind of glad it ended like it did
But part of me still sings just like you did
You were my best friend, but now you're a rapist
So I threw you on the curb
And the fact is, I should have seen this coming
There's a reason violence is a noun, not a verb
It lasts forever
It's who you are
If you like making people bleed and leaving scars
It's hard to care how it's justified
You taught someone how to kill a dream, a heart
And if they cannot fight you back, I know someone who will
It's me, I'll start
It's me, I'll start
So if I see you at a show someday
I've practiced in the shower what I'll say
Fuck all that, I hope that you die young
Without any remorse leaving my tongue
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2. |
King Of This Bunkbed
05:30
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I'm running out of songs to write
I'm running out of way to say I want to die
I'm running out of chances to cry wolf
I was sober all night
I can't have sex with you
And I can't hold your hand
I can't sleep next to you
And I can't be your man
I can't be your man
I'm running out of ways
To show you that I care
But is it still as meaningful
When you know it's hard to say, and I am scared
There's a song I used to sing
When I was home alone, and in my bunkbed
And it sounds like this, except
A little quieter, for
I'm ashamed of how I really feel, oh I'm
Ashamed of how I really feel, oh I'm
Ashamed of how I really feel, oh I'm
Ashamed of how I feel
Here comes the good part
Here comes the good part
Coming up, coming up, coming up
I can't explain why it's so comforting
'Cause really, I don't know
There is something to be said
About never leaving home
(instrumental)
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3. |
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I know what I want
Happiness, it's pretty simple
Isn't that universal
I know I am strong
I know I am strong of spirit
What's stopping me from getting things I want
Nothing
It's not my fault I'm not great at anything, it's
Not my fault I'm not good at much, it is
Not my fault I am master of no situation
I've ever been in, I've ever been in
(instrumental)
I believe in God
I think that's an understatement
I've looked death in the eyes, I've moved past it
And I'm still alive
It's icy and it's slow
And it comes to me on bridges when infinity's below
It's within my grasp
I am a train, I can't find the tracks
It's not my fault I am aging so quickly, it's
Not my fault I'm this far from home
I have never been closer to dreams of being
Two years old
I'm crawling on the carpet
I like to go downstairs
So I go there
(instrumental)
I know what I want
That's the difference between me and you
Trust me, I know it way better than any of you bastards do
I love anyone
Who takes up arms
Against a system that fucks them and causes them harm
And I wouldn't say it's romantic
It's a war fought with sobbing and suicide in lieu of arms
And I know this part by heart
It's familiar from the start
It's that all-destroying smell
I guess this is rock bottom
I've always wondered what that felt like
Doesn't feel like much
I guess I'll never know
You might never know
Pray you never know
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4. |
Tower Of Silence
08:10
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You know it's hard to say but you know I'll try my best
I've tried a lot of times but most of those times I've guessed
It isn't easy to at all, to admit there's something wrong with me
Wrong with me, wrong with me
And i don't want to be here, i'm sure you understand
What it feels like to have another person in your head
I'm getting sick of all the noise, getting sick of being
In this state of mind
State of mind, state of mind, state of mind
(instrumental)
Now I'm all alone here and I think
This could use a cleaning
'Cause it stinks in here so bad
I don't know how I can stand it
How'd I ever let it go this long
I blinked and I was twenty
Well, that scares me deeply
I'll never blink again
Some boxes full of wine
And suddenly, a rush of new sensations from behind
Picture of a young man drinking
Sound of an old car driving
Visions of our ship sinking
Memories of angels singing
Who let the prisoners out of their cage
Who left the keys lying next to the grates
Is anyone else left thinking
That we don't control our destinies
That we should let them be
When people die, do they give up their dignity
Or not, or not, or not
I was sleeping in a deathbed
I woke up
I guess it wasn't mine
Well, that's the greatest pleasure I have ever known
You tell me I sound crazy
When I try
To better myself, oh
Inspiration is a demon in disguise
Most of the time, I feel alright
That's part of the problem
That's part of the problem
That's part of the problem
That's the worst part and I make light of it
I'll crack a smile
Then you'll crack a smile
Then we'll laugh
Then we'll laugh
Then we'll laugh
Laugh, laugh
But when we laugh, we get self-conscious
Conscious, conscious, conscious
We start sweating on our smashed up faces
The combination of our respective parents' genetics
Folded into a brand new kind of thoroughly wasted space
Personality-less apes
Impressions of what our parents thought of us
And remnants of the names the big kids
Called us on the playground back in school
(instrumental)
Our personal years never really meant anything
The combination of our respective parents' genetics
Folded up in a little paper box from KFC
Personality-less apes
Reflections of what we see in mirrors
After staring at ourselves for hours
Chanting incantations all the while
(instrumental)
They told me it gets better, they were wrong
They told me it gets better, they were wrong
If you honestly think it gets better, well, you're lying to yourself
But that's not the worst part about it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of ityou can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of it
you can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of it
you can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of ityou can make light of it
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5. |
Song For A Young Falcon
06:34
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Picture a bell so great
The ringing never ends
Find that the eyes of gods
Peer out from everything
Picture a fire so warm
It sets the woods ablaze
Somehow I can see you there inside it
Forever I am waiting here to find it
And it's easy
It's so easy
It's so easy to give in
Even in my darkest days
There's little hints of light
But it's pretty dark at night
It's harder by the day
To pretend I don't miss the old ways
I don't miss my old friends
(instrumental)
No more senseless pain
No more sound of rain
No more bills to pay
No more fighting fate
No more fighting fate
No more fighting fate
Sometimes, in a quiet room
I'll hear an awful sound
Sometimes it passes by like wind
Sometimes it sticks around
I don't wanna live like this
I don't know how to live like this
I don't need medication, I am fine
I'm sorry I don't show it all the time
I don't need medication, I am fine
I'm sorry I don't show it all the time
(instrumental)
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6. |
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(instrumental)
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7. |
Sympathizer
06:19
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I didn't eat today
Or yesterday
And I can't say I'll eat tomorrow
Eating gives me energy
But there's that I would need energy for
Don't live like you're dying
Live like you're dead
You don't have to be scared
Of any of the things
That could kill you
'Cause everything around you could kill you
And I know that's true
There's nothing left that makes me happy anymore
And that's the case for absolutely everyone
But if you're not ready to admit that yet, it's fine
We'll get there if we try
That's growing up, that's what growing up is
We get older 'til we die
And mature until we're dead inside
I saw my heart today
I felt it say
"Kid, you're on the right track."
I didn't believe a word
I just couldn't take in what I had heard
I spent the best days of my life working late
I missed the party of a lifetime putting money in the bank
I miss the only thing that matters in this world
So consistently, that you might guess that
I'm some kind of masochist
(instrumental)
I wasn't made for this world
It's a little too harsh for me
I know a lot of folks who feel the same way
I know a lot of folks who tried hard to escape
You can do that if you try
That's suicide, that's what suicide is
No one you know is gonna end up right
But everything will end, somehow
Everyone will get a little bit better
Everyone gets happier, sometimes
(instrumental)
Just once, I'd like to smile and mean it
Just once, I'd like to smile and mean it
Just once, I'd like to smile and mean it
Just once, just once, just once
Just once, just once, just once
That's enough.
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we hold hands and we jump Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
Surprising no one, the artist behind this music is a trans woman now. This project may be dead and gone, but she continues to write music with a new band called "Sherry CD-ROM".
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